Beastly Burgers

Thunder Burger | 3056 M St. NW
Thunder Burger & Bar on M Street allows patrons to stay safely inside the Georgetown bubble while its edgy decor  — including leather chairs and animal-print upholstery — gives the restaurant more of a U-Street feel.

This is a great place if you’re looking to create your own burger masterpiece. Burgers can be ordered with a variety of toppings, ranging from the typical tomato, onions and mushrooms to  more distinctive toppings like pineapple salsa and foie gras. No matter what you choose, make sure to include the homemade remoulade which is basically mayonnaise with a ton of amazing spices.

If you’d prefer to leave the burger building to the masters, Thunder Burger offers a wide selection of amusingly named and delicious options. A personal favorite is the Pig in a Cow Suit, a beef burger topped with BBQ pork .

Thunder Burger’s only drawback is the unreliable service; I was once forgotten by the hostess and waited over thirty minutes to get seated. But once your plate arrives in front of you, I think you’ll agree that Thunder Burger’s dishes are worth the wait.

Good Stuff Eatery | 303 Pennsylvania Ave. SE

This kitschy, diner-esque joint might be the best burger place in D.C. The creamy milkshakes and addictive fries make a trip over to Capitol Hill well worth the Metro fare, even if, for whatever reason, you don’t like burgers.

That being said, the burgers are awesome. The classic Farmhouse Burger sticks to basics but still includes Good Stuff Sauce, a mysterious substance that makes your mouth say “Weeeee!” Get patriotic with the Prez Obama Burger, which includes applewood bacon, onion marmalade and horseradish mayo, or healthy with the Michelle Melt, which features a turkey burger and a whole wheat bun.

Any of the burgers can “Shun the Bun” and be wrapped in lettuce, so all your gluten-free friends can come along. If you’re crazy — I mean, if you’re vegetarian — definitely try the  ’Shroom burger, composed of a portobello mushroom stuffed with Muenster and cheddar.

Your tab might start to add up when you include the rosemary and thyme fries and any of the delectable milkshakes. These are not optional, so make sure to share with your friends.

BGR The Burger Joint | 1514 Connecticut Ave NW

This franchise, which started in D.C., is located in Dupont Circle and offers a quick and delicious lunch after trick-or-treating on Embassy Row or browsing the Phillips Collection. Though BGR advertises “the one burger YOU MUST HAVE before you die,” the sides that come with it  make this place distinctive.

Make sure to order any of the tasty fries. The Orange Standard sweet potato fries are very popular, while the Green Standard asparagus fries — simple, grilled, delicious asparagus spears — offer a healthy option that is a little more out of the box.

The Veggie Burger — a unique blend of brown rice, oats, black beans and molasses — will satisfy any vegetarian and is good enough to tempt even the staunchest carnivore. Combine it with the asparagus fries, and you have a guilt-free meal.

Ray’s Hell Burger | 1725 Wilson Blvd. Arlington, Va.

At this no-fuss restaurant in Rosslyn, the burgers truly shine. The tables have rolls of paper towels in lieu of napkins, and the menu is a list of toppings that you choose from to build your burger. Pick the cheese from options like smoked mozzarella, Vermont white cheddar, Brie and provolone, and add guacamole or a runny egg. Free toppings include grilled onions, charred jalapenos, roasted garlic and some exclusive hot sauces. If you’re searching for guidance, they have suggested combinations — beware the Diablo burger, which is so full of spicy add-ons like jalapenos and “piranha sauce” that it’s only for those with taste buds of steel.

The burgers here are enormous, but you won’t be able to resist indulging in the entire thing. They’re perfectly cooked, juicy and rich in flavor. The fries are a perfect complement, but you’ll be so full from the main event that you’ll probably want to split them with a friend. For the over-twenty-one crowd, they’re stocked with a selection of craft beers as well.