Georgetown University’s Newspaper of Record since 1920

The Hoya

Georgetown University’s Newspaper of Record since 1920

The Hoya

Georgetown University’s Newspaper of Record since 1920

The Hoya

NGUYEN: In Choir, A Chance to Find God’s Voice

NGUYEN%3A+In+Choir%2C+A+Chance+to+Find+Gods+Voice

Before coming to college, my faith felt like an obligation. I come from a long line of Catholics who taught me belief in God was a necessity — and anything short of complete faith would guarantee damnation. I associated Mass with loss of my free will and wondered how many countless hours I had wasted in the pew of a church.

But once I got to Georgetown University, I found my old habits hard to bury. Soon, I was attending 9 p.m. Mass in Dahlgren Chapel every Sunday.

As a freshman, church was the only place where life didn’t feel new, and I didn’t feel so different or weird. I knew how to be Catholic; I had been doing it all my life. I went to Mass because I knew my parents would be happy knowing faith was still part of my life. But I didn’t expect to find something deeper.

I found God in the dingy choir room of my home parish singing “Ubi Caritas.” When I sang classics like “On Eagle’s Wings” and “Do Not Be Afraid,” I was reminded of the existence of a God who was bigger and stronger than the problems in my life. These hymns comforted me, as they told me I am never alone or forgotten. I held onto the joy and happiness I felt when I sang those hymns at my home parish and took them with me when I signed up for chapel choir freshman year, hoping for another place where I could find God.

As a freshman, chapel choir became a harbor of sorts from the constant newness of living on my own. I found the same God I found when I was 10 years old, but in newer hymns and psalms.

In “The Servant Song,” I found a Jesus who was willing to laugh and cry with me, even though I never asked him to. In “These Alone Are Enough,” I found a Jesus who challenged me to forgo my worries and fears and follow him. This simple and pretty tune, based on St. Ignatius’ “Suscipe” prayer, challenges us to return to God our “liberty, memory and understanding” with the blind faith that He will use them to create a better world according to His will. There’s a grandness in this request that demands an absolute surrender of free will: Am I capable of shedding all that I am and letting God’s love and grace be enough for me? Sometimes I don’t think I am.

On those days, I tuck myself away in Dahlgren Chapel and remind myself that there are bigger and better things than what conventional society tells me to worship. Even though there are some days when I cannot say truthfully that God’s love and grace are enough for me, it’s something I aspire to.

Chapel choir was a place where I learned how to love God and, through that love, how to love myself. There was a freedom in serving God that allowed me to stop worrying so much about resume-building or good grades. I started to ask myself how I was serving God in everything I did, as it gave me the strength to persevere knowing that I was doing everything for His glory.

If you had told me when I first got to Georgetown that God would become my reason for fulfillment, I would have laughed. As a freshman, I thought happiness meant being the best pre-med student with the most impressive resume. I wasn’t looking for God’s love and grace because I didn’t think I needed them to be happy. I didn’t set out to be devout or religious, but it was through the hymns sung in chapel choir and the quiet moments sitting in Dahlgren at odd hours of the night that I found a God who loved all parts of me, even though sometimes I find it hard to love Him back. Through Him, I found a happiness that revealed the most authentic version of me.

Truc Nguyen is a junior in the School of Nursing and Health Studies. Into the Feminine Genius appears online every other Wednesday.

Leave a Comment
More to Discover

Comments (0)

All The Hoya Picks Reader Picks Sort: Newest

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *